An article brought to you by Dara Kurtz. Dara Kurtz is a breast cancer survivor and provides Survivor Mentorship & Support at Cancer Services.
More than thirteen years after my breast cancer diagnosis, I still get triggered.
It doesn’t happen as often as it used to, and time has definitely helped me trust that everything will continue to be OK… that I’ll stay healthy. But every now and then, I feel that familiar fear creep in. I’ll read about another woman whose cancer returned or see a Facebook post about an early-stage diagnosis that later became metastatic. In an instant, my mind can go from calm to fearful. Suddenly, I find myself asking, what if that happens to me?
If you’ve experienced this, you’re not alone.
Cancer changes us, and sometimes, our minds continue to respond as if we’re still in survival mode. Certain stories, doctor appointments, scans, anniversaries, or even a random social media post can bring back feelings of fear and uncertainty. The important thing to remember is that another person’s story is not your story.
Every diagnosis is different. Every cancer subtype is different. Treatments vary. Outcomes vary. Comparing ourselves to someone else’s journey only fuels anxiety and robs us of the peace we deserve today.
While we can’t control every thought that enters our minds, we can take charge of how we respond to them.
Here are a few tools that can help:
Pause and calm your nervous system.
When anxiety starts to rise, take a few slow breaths. A short meditation, gentle stretching, or simply stepping outside for fresh air can help signal to your body that you are safe. You don’t have to stay stuck in fight-or-flight mode.
Write it out.
Journaling can help get anxious thoughts out of your head and onto paper. Sometimes just naming your fears reduces their power. You might ask yourself, What am I feeling right now? What do I know to be true?
Talk to someone.
A therapist, trusted friend, spiritual leader, or oncology social worker can help you process fears that feel too heavy to carry alone. Seeking support is not a sign of weakness. It’s a sign of strength.
Find your people.
Support groups can be incredibly healing. There’s something powerful about sitting with people who understand without explanation. Whether it’s an in-person group or virtual community, connection reminds us that we don’t have to do this alone. Cancer Services support groups are active and available to you for free. Just come. You’ll be glad you did.
Talk to your doctor.
If anxiety is interfering with your daily life, sleep, or ability to enjoy life, bring it up with your health care team. There are resources and treatments available, and you deserve support for your emotional health. You just have to ask for it.
Remember that resilience isn’t perfection.
Being resilient doesn’t mean having a bad day or never spiraling into fear. It means knowing how to find your way back. It means having a freat-out moment and then using the tools you’ve learned to help you get grounded again.
I’ve learned that taking charge of my mind isn’t about eliminating fear completely. It’s about not letting the fear take over when it shows up. We can’t control everything, but we can learn to move through anxiety, return to the present moment, and focus on the day we’re in.
From my heart to yours,
Dara
To read more tips from Dara Kurtz, check out our Empowered Living Page. You can also check out her substack page here!
Choose One (or All) of our July Challenges!
- Read Dara’s April Empowered Living article about “Taking Charge of Your Mind After Cancer” DONE!! EMAIL US TO REQUEST YOUR STICKER!
- Make America’s 250th Anniversary Pillow at the Art & Wellness workshop (virtual or in person at Cancer Services, Inc. office) on July 24th at 2pm.
- Join July’s Nourish and Thrive: Nutrition Webinar on Thursday, July 16 at 2pm
- Watch one of our expert interviews on a topic that interests you! Find them here: cancerservicesonline.org/expert
- Register for the Eat The Rainbow Challenge!
